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Keletso Thobega

“I am a little bit of everything all rolled into one.I am a lover,I am a child, I am a mother,I am a sinner, I am a saint. I do not feel ashamed.I am your hell, I am your dream, I am nothing in between.”

“I am the past you know nothing bout. The future you cannot ignore.”

Developing self-esteem in wisdom

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Never has self-actualization been as important as during the times we are living in. Human beings have developed to a point that they have realized not only their physical and intellectual potential but their inner ability to contribute to the people they are and become.

There are wise people and there are those who lack wisdom. Unfortunately, wisdom cannot be measured by societal expectations and standards. This is because it transcends simple intelligence, logic and being robust and opinionated. While the mentioned qualities are fine, wisdom allows a human being to be elevated in mind, body and soul. And you ask who has time to chase wisdom when there is money to be pursued? And I reply, doesn’t abundance that we seek lie in both money and wisdom to pursue your agenda as a human being in these transitional times that we live in.

In our current social landscape, wisdom seems unattainable due to low self-esteem. Self-esteem is a state of mind that reflects how you feel and think of yourself and others through your actions. It instigates a positive sense of inherent worth through learned feelings and thoughts (self-confidence, self-worth, self-respect).This allows for peace and harmony with yourself and environment. In wisdom we can try to find our wholeness-it is not perfection but greatness, a show of human greatness, personally, socially and spiritually-an epitome of human creation and pride.

Low self-esteem and inferioty is an adopted habit that some pick up on during life. Note how confident and assured babies and small children are. This is challenged as they are exposed to more people and lose grasp of their innocence, for the world seems to serve the purpose of roughing us up so that we develop our potential further. Low-self esteem is enforced by habitual negative reactions (like being taught aggression instead of assertiveness), constant criticism by parents, teachers and peers, environment and media effects, cultural background and societal pressures in general. These are reinforced by negative belief patterns and low-self esteem becomes a norm rather than an exception. What many do not realize is the way the unconscious mind is more active than the conscious-which reinforces the power of the mind.

Many Africans have self-esteem issues and the many years of oppression have not helped in the human development of our people hence movements like black consciousness, African renaissance (which are rooted in self-esteem development so we can embrace ourselves fully).

Only a few, if any, things are possible without a healthy and high self-esteem. A low self-esteem is highly destructive to an individual and the people around him or her. It easily breeds feelings like jealousy, hate, spite, anger etc. Negative behaviour, attitudes and thoughts come from a poor self-esteem. Many a time, people with healthy self esteem will prefer to identify themselves with positive qualities as they are assured of themselves and need no exterior validation, thus making their lives seem like a dream. I know you have met some people who seemed to take life in their strides and advance more than you ever think possible, in all aspects of their lives.

Responsibility for one’s feelings and actions is the first step to liberating ourselves. It is an “old” story but one that will remain relevant until we experience changes in our and other’s lives. Consider whether you are drowning yourself in pools negativety and save yourself.

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