Letter To My Ex
We were so young yet we had love that could not be quantified and it was true I never took it into account the possibility of living this long without your sight. Thought it was going to be us till the end of time, if you could would you have prevented that day from coming to pass?
We were separated when feral flowers were blooming a season of utmost love, we thought death was mare and the only fate to face. Unfortunately unforeseen life’s state of affairs robbed my dearest from me. Lived each day for years that I have since lost count of, trying hard to forget you but how is it possible when I keep on vividly remembering the moments we sweetly shared when we were together could it be the undying power of love or lack of enthusiasm to move on that sat and made its roots veins of thy own heart.
How do I truthfully embrace another heart when I know if my own was to be questioned if it loves thee wholly, my affirmation would be choking with deceit and unjust to her who considers my heart as her own not knowing mine was conquered not by her but you therefor it belongs to you and longs for your love my love. If destiny is a way that made you part then let me linger not in vain but in faith that someday our paths shall meet once more. I’ll always love you.
Finding the right words was never easy
So I discovered that writing was a passage way to relief for it brought back my strength,
In a certain way it comforted and nursed my heartaches.
I was expressing myself in a silent way
In solitary I was safe from you and a feast to misery.
Day and night you turned my life to nothing but a vortex of anguish
I lost self-confidence I became void,
the only willpower I had was to gather strength to put an end to my sorrows
but I couldn’t come up with a workable approach
Until the night when you forced yourself on me
I used to think you were heartless less did I knew the devil behind the man I called my husband
So I never took it as a misdemeanor uprooting a weed and living it to wilt
Glad I felt as I considered my justified unlawful act
an end to the pain that you inflicted upon my life
Behind these iron bars I find myself free
– End –
Inspired By The Song “Deuces”
You make it a point that I see how guilty I am, yet for your wrong deeds you justify
By all means, barely you accept you are wrong.
I know when I step on your feet I hear you when I mistreat you and hurt your feelings
How could I not when you voice it out loud. I am the voiceless, the one who finds comfort
Between the bathroom walls in solitary where my tears are my answers
Where I kneel and thank God for the present for I know he is still watching over me.
It’s funny that you say you care, the day before I twisted in pain
I felt the stomach cramps alone; I looked at you and wished you were my mother
At least I know she wouldn’t have neglected me.
Yes you have given me shelter, food and sometimes clothe me,
Your meaning of love your way of expressing it,
Guess you wouldn’t have done all this if I was not the one desired by your heart.
You not wrong to think you my only salvation you wrong to forget how I got here
You not wrong to condemn my father for failing to help me out in life
You wrong to make me feel abandoned;
You distorted the sense of belonging in me a thought that haunts me daylight.
What’s love about?, I ask.
For if I’m not able to show gratitude for your love the same way I receive it
It’s always going to be an expressed message without sound.
I feel sorry for I know someday you going to wish I stayed.
– End –