My Experience with motherhood
Me: ”Baby can you please get me some ”eburo na nkatse” ?
Kwame: sure why not Sweet
After 10 minutes, I call again”Can you please add yogurt and some pork chops?
Kwame: Ei sweet, what kind of combination is that?
Me: (getting upset)…..just bring it!
This was my life few months prior to the birth of our daughter, Awurama. I was always hungry, tired, nauseated and felt like a big cow. I sometimes felt like it will take forever to have the baby.
I stand in front of the bathroom mirror and I ask myself ”Whose breasts are these anyway”? and oh lest I forget! the stretch marks! It looked as if my nephew Baba has been drawing lines and stripes on my belly, thighs, and arms . I felt sad sometimes and I blamed my husband for making me ”big” For my nose, the least said about it, the better
Then finally the day came! A Friday
I had just finished cooking some spicy jollof (I was at my parents’ at the time); it was a Friday. I took my bath, served myself and decided to sit under the fan to enjoy the ‘fruit of my labour’ …..then suddenly I felt a sharp pain…………………
Could it be? I wondered or maybe not. So i continued enjoying my spicy jollof interspersed with beef, carrots and green peppers but the next minute saw me call out to my mother…Mma! Mma! I cried out ”I think she wants to come out!
My waters had still not broken but I was experiencing ‘menstrual cramp-like pains’ and it was terrible. I just wanted it to stop. We called my midwife who happened to by my aunt and she asked how the contractions were; by this time, it was 5 minutes apart
Damn I wanted to pull my hair off! I was not crying but i was just in pain. We stepped out to get a taxi and set off for the hospital around the Anaji Area around 5pm
…….About 500 meters away from the hospital , we heard a boom sound; apparently the tire of the taxi we were traveling in had burst!
O Dear Lord, I prayed please help me; my mum also started praying. After waiting for close to 20 minutes, we got another taxi since I obviously could not wait for the driver to fix a spare tire.
At the Hospital, I was told to lie down on a bed across where the midwives sat. They complained about another woman in labour who wanted to have a normal delivery when she’s been advised she cannot push because she was going to have a big baby. As I watched the midwives going back and forth and advising the young lady, I felt myself drifting away, I was tired and hungry and wished i had ate my sweet jollof. It was at this time that my husband came in
When he saw me lying there in pain, he held my hand and told me it is well. The midwife then came to check how far I had dilated, it was just 2cm! ”well you have to dilate to 10cm o” the midwife said and scurried of to the”gossip table”
Eiiiii! 8cm more? I wondered..I started praying again. God please don’t let me die, please save me, Please …that was my prayer. They then decided to induce me with an injection on my thighs and a pill under my tongue. Contractions at this time were just a minute apart and I was twisting and turning and throwing up my little jollof I had taken few hours earlier
Because my waters had still not broken at this time, my aunt came over checked me up and broke it and my! It was not what I expected …..it looked like a black substance
”This is not good” I heard my aunt tell my mum….. Oh Jesus! was what she could say. I saw she was worried. I was told ‘broken waters’ had to be clear but I sensed there was a problem because I saw my aunt go out to make a call. My mother was also calling someone. By this time the pain was was just too much to bear. I heard one nurse telling my husband to go home and pray
A midwife then came to tell me that dilation had stopped, ”you are not progressing dear” She said… It was around 10pm
As I lay there all I could think of was the bible text, Exodus 1:19 ”The midwives answered Pharaoh, “Hebrew women are not like Egyptian women; they are vigorous and give birth before the midwives arrive.” I kept trusting God, I prayed in m weak state and asked him to intervene.
Finally, my midwife came and whispered to me that ”You are not dilating, you are experiencing what we call ”fetal distress” and we have to arrange a Cesarean Section as soon as possible and I need you to sign this” Ok I said Feebly, I signed the form giving them access to operate me
The Doctor was called one Dr Fenyi, he came in his Pajamas. It was around midnight
As they prepared me for the theater, I just wondered how it was going to be like as I had read about it. When the doctor was ready to cut, I realized my eyes could not stay open as I had anesthesia injected into my infusion ……………………
So I slept
Saturday 29th March
I saw the curtains flowing in opposite directions, people walking in slow motion and babies crying. I felt my tummy, no baby! “Did someone steal my baby?”
”Am I dead?” I wondered. I tried to get up but heard someone say ”Madam please don’t try it ; you will hurt yourself”. I fell back; I had a big plaster on my abdomen
Then I realized surgery was actually over and I was in the recovery ward. I asked where my baby was and a young nurse came over and said ”you had a beautiful girl here she is” She was perfect! I saw her tiny fingers and her eyes and oh how she looked like her father especially the forehead! She arrived at 1:46am on Saturday. Since I already have a Kwame Nkrumah, I just smiled and said thank you to God for giving me ‘Ama Ghana’
I was so elated that the pain and anguish actually paid off. It was at this time, that my husband walked in with my mum to see me and the look on his face when he held our daughter in his arms was PRICELESS! I had never seen him as happy as that day. I looked up to the ceiling and said” Thank you Jesus”
He was the happiest man on earth! And thanks to God, and my parents, we had a lot to be thankful for. As I held my daughter for the first time to breastfeed, all I did was smile because God had dealt well with me and at that moment I appreciated my mother even the more.
I was discharged after spending some five days at the hospital. The rest as they say “is history”.
Pregnancy and Motherhood are beautiful experiences every woman must go through. It is the one thing that makes you realize that there is a God out there who watches over us. It makes you a better person and you will learn to respect and appreciate people more.
It is not every day you get husbands who help with stuff at home and care for the baby but my husband is an exception. He is such a wonderful man and I couldn’t have prayed for a better man. I love you Kwame! The children and I are blessed to have you! You rock k3k3!
Dedicated to all mothers!
My Experience with motherhood,
